Inspired

It's been a rough week for us. Nothing terrible has happened, just a lot of little things that we haven't been handling very well.

Let's begin with Cole. He has had the same the teacher for both Kindergarten and first grade and has grown very attached to her. She had a baby this last week, which means that Cole has had a sub for a the last two weeks. In the same 3 day period as the teachers changed, he also finished up soccer and started baseball. So, there's been a lot of change for him and he's not adjusting very well. (And we changed the rooms around too, I'm sure that hasn't help!) He's having a very hard time focusing and acting appropriately, just being really goofy/silly. Of course, his teacher, his coach or us have been allowing him to get away with acting this way. I just couldn't figure out why he was acting up, it took a little over a week then it clicked! I asked Cole if he missed his teacher and he started crying and said that it's just not the same without her and that the sub just doesn't understand him. I felt so bad for being hard on him and since then I've been trying really hard to do special things for him. However, everything that I try to do backfires. I won't get into the details on that, but I just feel like I can't win. And it's been so hard to not get upset with him when he's acting up, I have a hard time having my 7 1/2 year old acting like a 3 year old ;) But, as parents, we need to lead by example and we need to teach him the correct way to handle the feelings that he's having. But isn't it so draining sometimes to be the example when you just want to fall apart? That's a hard thing to admit.

Also, Marty and I are trying to apply the extra income we've been receiving from his raise to pay off some medical bills and student loans that we just weren't able to take care of on the income we were bringing in before. Another challenge for us. The little devil on one shoulder is telling me "Go play with the money! You've earned it! Have fun!" And the little angel on the other shoulder is telling me "Stick to your plan, it will pay off. You have the self control".

See, like I said, it's nothing terrible and I've known that all week. But when I start to get stressed and worn out, I don't sleep well and it just starts a cycle. Then I start to look around become very negative about everything little thing: We need a bigger table! A bigger house too! Didn't I just dust? The garage is messy again? MORE LAUNDRY??!! I wish my boobs were bigger and my hips smaller...bla bla bla bla bla! I've know all week that I need to "snap out of it". "It" being this little pitty party that I am having.

I tried everything that I could think of to snap out of it. Leaning on a friend; watching a favorite movie; listening to a favorite song; organizing; cleaning; baking; going on a walk with the family; going one alone. Nothing seemed to help. Then last night, I stumbled across a friend's blog and her most recent post was exactly what I needed. Her blog is private, but here is the part that really struck me:

• So, basically this week has been challenging to say the least. Things I "love" are being stained and dented and roughed up. Normally I would have just done what it took to get my lovely possessions repaired or replaced and go about a happy, pretty life. The Lord has really been working on my heart... when I started feeling sad about my car or frustrated about the lawn mower, or had major cravings for french fries, God reminded me of all the people around the world suffering from tornadoes and earthquakes. He showed me people searching through rubble they once called 'home' looking for things that could be salvaged. It has been a humbling week and today I thank God for a stained chair pad because that means I have a child to sit on that chair. And I thank God for a bump on my car because at least I have a car to get my family around town, and the dent reminds me to drive carefully, because I could have hit something else, someONE. So many things in life are taken for granted. Take time today and thank the Lord for the blessings He has given you and your family. If you look, you'll see.

I don't consider myself a religious person, but this really spoke to my heart. I felt as if someone had just slapped the pitty party right out of me ;) I immediately felt thankful that my husband has a job to help us pay these bills and make a living. And that I have a son who is so compassionate and has so much love for someone. And that I have kids to teach such life lessons too. And so on. And after reading it, I went to clean up the lake in the bathroom that the kids made during their bath, I felt thankful that I have a bathroom to clean up and healthy, happy kids to bathe.

How did she know I needed that? Thank you, friend, for sharing your challenges, thoughts and faith with us and for unknowingly "snapping me out of IT"

I slept well last night and the little things are honestly not getting to me today. I think it's going to be a great weekend, no matter what challenges life brings!